Working with MärRem Remington, LMFT
- Play therapy
- Parenting classes
- Consultations for parents
- Activities to strengthen the bonds between caregiver and child(ren)
- School and/or family observations to create effective strategies for your child's success
- Attendance at school meetings to support you and your child
(1) There is hope that change is possible for your child.
Integrated NeuroSensory Processing (INSP)
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I have created a way of working with people who are “wired differently” called Integrated NeuroSensory Processing (INSP). This holistic systems-based approach integrates biological, psychological, social, cognitive, and relational theories and interventions. With INSP, we focus on strengths and reinforce them as they arise, marking and celebrating each small step along the way.
Together parents, children, and I co-create fun experiments to discover how much and what kinds of supports are needed for change to happen. In other words, please DO try this at home. In those times when you are getting conflicting advice or complex recommendations, I assist parents by distilling out the most essential points into everyday terms, by explaining the implications for the family and collaborating with other professionals directly for optimum clarity as needed. My greatest triumph is when a parent starts to take delight in joyful moments with their child, loving and accepting them as they are. I help parents learn how it is possible for their child to develop skills that will help them thrive in a productive life, engage as an active part of their community, and love the life they live. |
(2) I know how change happens from first-person experience: I’ve lived this.
I’ve been front and center as this field of knowledge has expanded.
How do I know? It takes one to know one, as they say. I’ve disconnected and melted down, too. I have lived those moments of not knowing where to start, let alone what to believe or where to go for help. I get it: and there are real things that can make a difference. As the saying goes, when you get lemons, make lemonade — and I’ve learned how to make fabulous lemonade.
Being “wired differently" has propelled me on a life-long quest to understand and figure out what actually works. What provides genuine relief? What strengthens connections with the people I love? What helped me succeed as a student, and now as a professional and business owner? This pursuit has lead me through a maze of specialists, theories, experts, diets, medications, specially designed tools, systemized approaches — you name it! Every bit of knowledge I’ve gained fills in a piece of the puzzle toward living life to its fullest and helping others like me do the same.
I’ve been front and center as this field of knowledge has been explored and expanded over the past four decades. I’m grateful to have been granted rare opportunities to learn from pioneers in the field. My professional training and experience empowers me to employ seemingly unorthodox methods and ideas to establish profound connections, obtaining highly effective results. My personal experience enables me to untangle the truth at the core of each child. I relish untangling every little puzzle that comes my way, because I am one.
Being “wired differently" has propelled me on a life-long quest to understand and figure out what actually works. What provides genuine relief? What strengthens connections with the people I love? What helped me succeed as a student, and now as a professional and business owner? This pursuit has lead me through a maze of specialists, theories, experts, diets, medications, specially designed tools, systemized approaches — you name it! Every bit of knowledge I’ve gained fills in a piece of the puzzle toward living life to its fullest and helping others like me do the same.
I’ve been front and center as this field of knowledge has been explored and expanded over the past four decades. I’m grateful to have been granted rare opportunities to learn from pioneers in the field. My professional training and experience empowers me to employ seemingly unorthodox methods and ideas to establish profound connections, obtaining highly effective results. My personal experience enables me to untangle the truth at the core of each child. I relish untangling every little puzzle that comes my way, because I am one.
(3) We start right where we are, get our bearings and plot our course of exploration.
Our findings help us build a roadmap of paths and pitfalls.
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I meet children where they are, as they are, in each moment. As a fellow native of these foreign worlds, I know this territory. Together we go exploring.
Gradually, as a child begins to invite me along on adventures, she shares her world. I am initiated into her own distinct internal culture, conventions, and methods. In getting the lay of the land, I begin to see the struggles and frustrations, the detours and the bluffs. I don’t “rescue” her, instead I serve as a resourceful scout. I am continuously surveying for a variety of signs and signals to guide our direction. I am watchful, observing for indicators like:
As things open up, we explore how each of us perceives what is happening. We decode some of your child’s interpretations and perspectives, as well as discuss how that same experience might seem to someone else. We construct ways of linking her world and your world, then expand her understanding of the world around her. Over time we create a shared language, a shared way of working together. Like detectives on the case, looking for clues, we deduce what seems to be working and what isn’t working so well. Like scientists, we identify one small thing that might be ideal for a new approach and we try an experiment. We all get to co-create the experiments to ensure that we agree on treatment objectives and priorities. Each experiment tells us something more about untangling our mystery. Our findings help us build a roadmap of paths and pitfalls. And all along the way we learn to celebrate every little gain we have made. |
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(4) We co-create our plan for introducing change and we fine tune it together as we see results.
The time you share plays a pivotal role in your child’s development.
Parents have an active role in the work we do together. The experiments we co-create are as much yours as your child’s. The bonds we develop between you and your child are cumulative, reinforcing your cohesion and guiding how you’ll grow as a family week over week.
During the time that we have together in the playroom, your presence is indispensable. Your child and I need you to be fully engaged in observing and contributing to the experience. Be prepared to be invited to play or join the conversation at any moment. When our session wraps up, and you venture back into your daily life, there may be activities that we have agreed upon for you and your child to continue working on together at home. If you’ve ever tried to replicate what you’ve watched on a cooking show, you know how easy it can be to misjudge how things will come together when you try it at home — one substitution can make or break any given effort.
We will be asking your child to be honest, to reflect and to take risks. As such, your child and I will need you to be honest with us — as honest as you can be. Your child wants this to work. When you can be authentic about life’s little foibles, you become more real to your child. You know — sharing those moments when your feelings got hurt, you slipped-up and somebody else got their feelings hurt, your best efforts were not quite enough, or the giggles got you at a serious moment. When you share truthfully about which commitments you can uphold, what you need, what you think about the experiments, and which parts you can carry out, only then can we refine each experiment, maximizing its potential for success and managing our shared expectations.
The time you share with your child outside of our sessions plays a pivotal role in your child’s development. We’ll discover ways to talk with your child that will open up your communication with each other. We’ll discover ways to engage in play that brings out the best in both of you. We’ll model the kinds of interactions that your child can emulate as they grow. You’ll learn to devise your own ways of effectively parenting your child, and cherishing them even more for who they are becoming.
I help parents learn how it is possible for their child to develop skills that will help them thrive in a productive life, engage as an active part of their community, and love the life they live. Your engagement with your child throughout this process is what brings it ALL to life.
During the time that we have together in the playroom, your presence is indispensable. Your child and I need you to be fully engaged in observing and contributing to the experience. Be prepared to be invited to play or join the conversation at any moment. When our session wraps up, and you venture back into your daily life, there may be activities that we have agreed upon for you and your child to continue working on together at home. If you’ve ever tried to replicate what you’ve watched on a cooking show, you know how easy it can be to misjudge how things will come together when you try it at home — one substitution can make or break any given effort.
We will be asking your child to be honest, to reflect and to take risks. As such, your child and I will need you to be honest with us — as honest as you can be. Your child wants this to work. When you can be authentic about life’s little foibles, you become more real to your child. You know — sharing those moments when your feelings got hurt, you slipped-up and somebody else got their feelings hurt, your best efforts were not quite enough, or the giggles got you at a serious moment. When you share truthfully about which commitments you can uphold, what you need, what you think about the experiments, and which parts you can carry out, only then can we refine each experiment, maximizing its potential for success and managing our shared expectations.
The time you share with your child outside of our sessions plays a pivotal role in your child’s development. We’ll discover ways to talk with your child that will open up your communication with each other. We’ll discover ways to engage in play that brings out the best in both of you. We’ll model the kinds of interactions that your child can emulate as they grow. You’ll learn to devise your own ways of effectively parenting your child, and cherishing them even more for who they are becoming.
I help parents learn how it is possible for their child to develop skills that will help them thrive in a productive life, engage as an active part of their community, and love the life they live. Your engagement with your child throughout this process is what brings it ALL to life.
(5) I’ll help you “secure your own oxygen mask first.”
It is important to realize that you don’t have to do this alone.
The demands of parenting a child who is “wired differently” are overwhelming. Nobody prepared you for this, yet here you are. You are doing everything you can think of, everything in your power, to shift things. Essential to my method of work is helping you stay engaged and connected to your child. Even on the tough days — those days when you can hear your own parent being channeled through you, when you swore you would never, ever _____ (fill in the blank). Every parent has that moment.
Parents struggle with a distinct set of issues beyond their child’s own struggles.
Not only are there the external realities of career duties, the rest of your family, and other responsibilities, but also the internal conflicts of the mixed feelings that arise from your first-person perspective on all of this. You want to be a good parent, you want to be a paragon of patience, but there are days when a cereal commercial can send you over the edge.
As we explore the unique inner-world of your child, as well as your world-views, we learn to appreciate just how these world-views collide. Collisions are opportunities to learn and grow. Your capacity to get through these collisions is critical to maintaining a secure bond with your child. “Securing your own oxygen mask first” is a real thing: it sustains your ability to breathe through an erupting situation without escalating things. Your self-care is a vital piece of the puzzle.
It is important to realize that you don’t have to do this alone. I’ll meet you where you are, too. Integral to our work together is helping you manage/cope/adapt so that you can be more available to your child, as well as your family and friends. We can talk about your experiences, your concerns and your own needs. Together we’ll explore resources and ideas that have helped other parents to accept the support of people around you who care.
My mission is to encourage and to help others see children who are “wired differently” as fascinating, rare, capable and self-defined. My greatest triumph is when a parent starts to take delight in joyful moments with their child, loving and accepting them as they are. Replenishing your own reserves makes delight possible. Your child can thrive. And so can you.
Parents struggle with a distinct set of issues beyond their child’s own struggles.
Not only are there the external realities of career duties, the rest of your family, and other responsibilities, but also the internal conflicts of the mixed feelings that arise from your first-person perspective on all of this. You want to be a good parent, you want to be a paragon of patience, but there are days when a cereal commercial can send you over the edge.
As we explore the unique inner-world of your child, as well as your world-views, we learn to appreciate just how these world-views collide. Collisions are opportunities to learn and grow. Your capacity to get through these collisions is critical to maintaining a secure bond with your child. “Securing your own oxygen mask first” is a real thing: it sustains your ability to breathe through an erupting situation without escalating things. Your self-care is a vital piece of the puzzle.
It is important to realize that you don’t have to do this alone. I’ll meet you where you are, too. Integral to our work together is helping you manage/cope/adapt so that you can be more available to your child, as well as your family and friends. We can talk about your experiences, your concerns and your own needs. Together we’ll explore resources and ideas that have helped other parents to accept the support of people around you who care.
My mission is to encourage and to help others see children who are “wired differently” as fascinating, rare, capable and self-defined. My greatest triumph is when a parent starts to take delight in joyful moments with their child, loving and accepting them as they are. Replenishing your own reserves makes delight possible. Your child can thrive. And so can you.
(6) You are not in this alone - it takes a village.
Greater gains for a student when everyone is working together.
They say raising a child takes a village: at times it takes a small army. There are pediatricians and other medical specialists, plus teachers and the school’s educational specialists — which means more and more new stakeholders. And often each stakeholder is working from the perspective of their specialty, without the benefit of all of the available information about your child. Sorting out who has which pieces of the puzzle — which pieces fit, and which pieces don’t — requires collaboration.
These professionals are all well-meaning, still innocent miscues can easily happen:
— a key piece of information might not get conveyed adequately,
— some terminology might be used differently by different specialists,
— a certain step might need to be completed before the next thing can begin.
As a parent, everyone is looking to you to lead that small army of professionals, to coordinate all of that information and make tough decisions on behalf of your child. This chapter wasn’t in the parenting books you’ve read. Collaboration sounds simple. It makes sense. Yet, often there is no one who coordinates this information, leaving parents to sort things out on their own.
Working with an experienced advocate can help. In those times when you are getting conflicting advice, complex information, or recommendations that don’t seem quite right, sometimes all it takes is a little extra communication and facilitation. A ‘magic’ word here and there has been known to work wonders.
In my practice, when needed, I can serve in the role of advocate. I reach out to other professionals to exchange knowledge and understand recommendations. I meet with school personnel, often with you, to discuss your child’s particular needs. I pull together the array of information and recommendations, distilling down the most essential points into everyday terms. We talk through it together to help you understand what is happening, share your desires, decipher your options, then prioritize your next steps.
My training in the Integrated Therapies Model reinforced what we intuitively know: the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. There are greater gains for a student when everyone is working together. As such, I continue to explore ways to support families and those they work with so all feel respect and their parts honored as each team of success is created for each child.
There are a lot of moving parts, I know. Caring for your child is demanding enough: mastering the system is an added burden. Learning the process shouldn’t become an obstacle to getting access to the expert care your family needs. I work with each family and professional with a collaborative approach because I have come to realize that we make much more progress when we all are cooperatively working the puzzle together.
These professionals are all well-meaning, still innocent miscues can easily happen:
— a key piece of information might not get conveyed adequately,
— some terminology might be used differently by different specialists,
— a certain step might need to be completed before the next thing can begin.
As a parent, everyone is looking to you to lead that small army of professionals, to coordinate all of that information and make tough decisions on behalf of your child. This chapter wasn’t in the parenting books you’ve read. Collaboration sounds simple. It makes sense. Yet, often there is no one who coordinates this information, leaving parents to sort things out on their own.
Working with an experienced advocate can help. In those times when you are getting conflicting advice, complex information, or recommendations that don’t seem quite right, sometimes all it takes is a little extra communication and facilitation. A ‘magic’ word here and there has been known to work wonders.
In my practice, when needed, I can serve in the role of advocate. I reach out to other professionals to exchange knowledge and understand recommendations. I meet with school personnel, often with you, to discuss your child’s particular needs. I pull together the array of information and recommendations, distilling down the most essential points into everyday terms. We talk through it together to help you understand what is happening, share your desires, decipher your options, then prioritize your next steps.
My training in the Integrated Therapies Model reinforced what we intuitively know: the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. There are greater gains for a student when everyone is working together. As such, I continue to explore ways to support families and those they work with so all feel respect and their parts honored as each team of success is created for each child.
There are a lot of moving parts, I know. Caring for your child is demanding enough: mastering the system is an added burden. Learning the process shouldn’t become an obstacle to getting access to the expert care your family needs. I work with each family and professional with a collaborative approach because I have come to realize that we make much more progress when we all are cooperatively working the puzzle together.
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